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Archive for the ‘New World; The’ Category

The New World – review – Film Comment #10

Film Comment – #10 – The New World – Terrance Malick – 2005


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I’m trying to recall another time where I watched a film and was so utterly bored out of my fucking mind that I just wanted it to end. I can only think of one, and that was watching “The English Patient”, another over-hyped piece of garbage.

“The New World” tells the story of John Smith and settlers from England coming to colonize what would become Virigina, in 1606. Once there, John is sent to try and make peace with the natives of the land, all while also trying to freak his freak with the sickly hot Pocahontas.

This is what occurs for basically the whole movie; hey lets stare off into the distance while we have some voice-overs, ok now lets stare into the camera and look all brooding, ok now lets walk around in tall grass and feel it, ok now lets touch each others weird clothes and hair that doesn’t make sense to us, ok lets be boring for another 2 hours. Oh yeah and I got the extended cut to enjoy. Weee! This is what I learned from the movie, Pocahontas was a hoochie that totally got around.

This thing taps in at almost 3 hours and is so fucking boring I had to stop it a few times and flip over to the Xbox to play some video games destroy shit just to wake myself up again. Terrence Malick is considered some kind of genius filmmaker, and while I thoroughly enjoyed his previous effort “The Thin Red Line”, this sucker doesn’t even come close. I will say this the cinematography is top notch with some really great landscape shots. Avoid this unless you’re trying to put the kiddies to sleep.

Grade: D+