Archive for the ‘Gone’ Category

Gone – review

Now is the time when studio’s begin unloading the trash that sits on their shelves, right after Oscar season.  We have to wait for all the big late spring/summer blockbusters too come out, so we are usually fed with a bunch of garbage.  I went to see Gone in the hopes that maybe a film snuck through the cracks and was going to take me by surprise…I’m afraid my friends, that’s not the case.  Gone is a paint by numbers, seen it all before thriller, starring Amanda Seyfried as Jill.  Jill was kidnapped a year prior and thrown in a hole in the woods in Oregon by a serial killer.   She escaped his clutches though, and is haunted by what happened to her.  The only problem is that not many people believe Jill is telling the truth about the mysterious man that has yet to be found.

Jill medicates herself every day with prescription drugs to keep her out of a mental hospital, and works the night shift at a diner.  She doesn’t trust the night, rarely sleeps, and takes self-defense classes all day long.  She lives with her sister Molly, and one morning after work discovers that Molly has gone missing.  Jill knows in her heart that the man who kidnapped her so long ago is behind it, and she sets out to find the man and save Molly before he can kill her.  She goes to the police, but they don’t believe her.  She’s cried wolf one too many times.  Now, I’m not really sure if cops are like this in Oregon, but if they are, Oregon is in a lot of trouble because they are all morons that sit around the office all day long.  This could be the worst portrayal of police officers ever on the big screen.  Jill has to go off on her own….this is were the film goes off in to lala land.

Jill begins stealing cars, and telling absurd stories to everyone she comes across in order to get the information she seeks.   Strangely, Jill just happens to find all the right random people to talk to, who just happen to have all the right information for her.  How convenient!  Jill plays connect the dots, but begins breaking the law as she does this, which sends our good old Mayberry clan after her.  They just can’t seem to track her down.  They try and GPS locate her calls, but she turns it off on her phone…but then starts using Google Maps for 20 minutes after they proclaim this?  Absurd things like this happen over the entire course of the film.  We start to wonder if Jill actually is insane, and also start to wonder who greenlit this piece of garbage as well.

I like Amanda Seyfried.  She’s been in some good films like Mean Girls, Alpha Dog, and Atom Egoyan’s Chloe. It’s nice seeing her get another shot at carrying a picture, unfortunately the director Heitor Dahlia, and scriptwriter, and everyone in between, left her hanging on this one.  Boring, formulaic, and a complete waste of time.

Grade: D